Are you ready to dive into the depths of conflict within relationships and emerge with newfound understanding and maturity? Join me, Julia Woods, a couples coach and 33 years of marriage, as I share my journey of grappling with immaturity during conflicts with my husband.

I invite you to explore five key signs that expose our immaturity as spouses during conflicts. 

The first sign is blaming

When something happens, and we don’t want to admit that we contributed to the outcome, we blame the other person. 

The second sign is that we make it about ourselves. At the root of most conflicts, one person is trying to communicate about the impact their spouse’s choices have on them while the other spouse is defending their intentions. When we are defending our intentions rather than seeking to empathize with the impact of our choices on our spouse we are acting immaturely.

The third sign is emotional unavailability. Sharing our emotions is vulnerable, and when we are arguing with our spouse, by nature we want to avoid vulnerability. 

The fourth sign is controlling.

The fourth sign is controlling.

When our spouse tries to help us see something we aren’t ready to look at or don’t want to see in ourselves, we will try to convince ourselves that they are attacking us. We then seek to control them or the conversation to avoid looking at what we don’t want to see.

The fifth is we choose vagueness. When in a conflict with our spouse, it is easy to see our spouse as untrustworthy or doubt that they have our best intentions at heart. So rather than being vulnerable, we communicate vaguely to try and avoid the real conversation.

These are common patterns that hinder healthy communication in relationships and expose our immaturity.

But it’s not just about recognizing the problem; we need to take action and grow emotional maturity. We must take responsibility for our contributions to conflicts, empathize with our partners, embrace vulnerability, relinquish control of conversations, and communicate honestly and openly. We can foster deeper connections, trust, and respect in our relationships through maturity.

I invite you to watch the full YouTube episode and join the conversation and share your thoughts in the comments section. Your engagement enriches the dialogue and contributes to a community committed to growth and understanding in relationships.

Thank you for embarking on this journey with me. Let’s embrace maturity and foster thriving, connected relationships together.

If you want to hear me talk about this more, I want to invite you to join me today on my latest YouTube episode

[Invite them to comment on something here – What are some things you wish you had known in your marriage? Do any of these resonate with you? Head over to the YouTube episode and I would love to hear from you in the comments!]

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