Have you ever decided your spouse is a bad communicator? Or maybe you’ve felt that way about yourself. Either way, we all have moments where our communication gets in the way of the connection we long for. If you want to change that, it starts by looking at what is not working in your communication. Join me today as we look at 5 Signs You’re Not Communicating Well with our spouse.
A marriage is created in communication. When we consistently choose life-giving conversations, our marriage will be full of life. Our marriage will be weary and despairing when our conversations are more unloving and defensive battles to be won. I know this well as a wife of 30+ years and a couples coach. My name is Julia Woods, and I am passionate about helping couples create life-giving communication so they can have the marriages they long for. If you want that, click the subscribe button on my YouTube channel to avoid missing an episode.
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The path to creating the marriage you long for is in your communication. If you change the way you communicate, you will change your marriage. So, let’s look at 5 important signs in our communication that are pointing you to where to start the work in transforming your marriage:
- Interrupting Your Spouse: Interrupting is a sign that you are proving and protecting what you think you already know, rather than listening to learn something new about your spouse. Life-giving communication begins when two people are willing to hear and learn from each other.
- Assuming: We often assume we know what our spouse will say or do. This blocks the possibility of them becoming new. Grow your ability to interrupt your assumptions and ask clarifying questions.
- Speaking in Absolutes: Saying things like “You always” or “You never” blocks your ability to partner with your spouse in creating something new. Use words like sometimes, often, or at times.
- Exaggerating: Exaggeration works to shame, belittle, or condemn your spouse. Instead, humbly express what you are feeling and desiring, and partner with your spouse to bring it about.
- Complaining vs. Requesting: Complaining creates bitterness and resentment. Life-giving conversations occur when you take 100% responsibility for what you long for and make requests to your spouse.
Nothing is wrong with you. You aren’t destined to be a bad communicator. You can communicate in life-giving ways. Simply notice where you are poorly communicating with your spouse and choose to turn what you just said into something that is communicated in a way they can hear and partner with you to create something new.
If you want to hear more about this, I want to invite you to join me today on my latest YouTube episode
If you want additional support with this, I invite you to take my quiz to help you learn more about your communication style. You can find the link in the description below.
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Where to Find Me
INSTAGRAM: Connect with me at @HeyJuliaWoods
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PODCAST: Listen at Hey Julia Woods
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WEBSITE: Find more resources at BeautifulOutcome.comFACEBOOK: Like me at /HeyJuliaWoods
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