There’s nothing worse than being in a marriage that is NOT working and having no idea how to shift things. Today, I want to share with you three reasons why your marriage is breaking down and what you can do about it!
3 Reasons Why Your Marriage Isn’t Working
Reason #1: You see your spouse as the problem
When we villainize our spouse and see them as the problem, this can lead to constant nagging, criticizing, and complaining. We then become two enemies trying to defend ourselves, rather than two lovers and partners in life trying to build something beautiful.
When you put your attention on your spouse as the problem, you stop being able to see your own contributions. Your own contributions are the only thing you have power over.
We fall into the blame game, which creates defensiveness and resistance. It blocks openness, love and connection.
Reason #2: You are avoiding conflict
Conflict produces tension inside of us and it’s what can create growth in a marriage.
If we resist the tension, it creates disconnection and bitterness and resentment begin to grow.
If we embrace the tension, it creates connection and understanding and partnership grows.
You’re either going to grow connection or disconnection based on how you show up in conflict, and you get to choose.
If you learn to be in the tension and break through it, you grow together.
Reason #3: You are talking more than listening
We can find ourselves talking a lot during conflict. We are trying to convince the other person what we believe we are right about. Guess what?
That doesn’t work.
When we’re in a posture of listening, we open up our heart and mind to new possibilities and discover who our spouse is.
If you want to hear me talk about this more, I want to invite you to join me today on my latest YouTube episode, “3 Reasons Your Marriage Isn’t Working & What To Do”
Do you see any of these in your marriage? Which ones are you committed to changing? Head over to the YouTube episode and I would love to hear from you in the comments.
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